October 13, 1927
Last week we told you of the extrahuman feats of two and one-half year-old Virginia Mae Pike. And now, collector of tale of childhood freakdom, comes two and one-half year-old Jimmy Baker Bogart.
The Pikes were fond of fumigators; the Bogarts, rusty razors. They’d leave them lying around until they’d accumulate sufficient rust to look tasty enough, one supposes. In any event, just such a brown’d blade seemed worth experimenting on with a new set of teeth, so li’l Jimmy bit off a chunk of Gillette. Though Mrs. Bogart pulled the major portion of our erstwhile whisker remover from Jimmy’s mouth, she watched a good piece of it go south. The hastily summoned physician, apparently seeking to avoid the imperative and serious operation, put JB on an oatmeal and potato diet and that was that; the razor remain was satisfactorily dissolved within.
One wonders if li’l Jimmy grew up to develop a pathological aversion to the “safety” device, or if, conversely, having developed a taste and his inclination, went on to ingest the objects for a living.